WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize