from now on my penis is your penis
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize