I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
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