ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
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