The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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