I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Randomize
