Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize
