Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
