theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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