I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Dignity is for republicans.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
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