no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
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