My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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