i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
