What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
