Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
