Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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