There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
She announced her abortion via fbk
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
