I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I would ride that face into the sunset
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
