The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Randomize
