The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
