just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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