He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Someone signed my nipple.
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