doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
