You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
