none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
