The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Randomize
