Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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