i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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