Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I'm bleeding and have questions
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
