You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
she peed on how many people?
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I'm bleeding and have questions
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Randomize
