what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
These tits shall not be calmed
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