it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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