I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
