i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
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