Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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