I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
