Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
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