I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
