Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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