Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Found your dick twin last night
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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