Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
She has the best kind of daddy issues
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
A+ Viking dick
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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