Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Randomize
