The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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