I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Randomize
