but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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