Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
