Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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