john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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