I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
