ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize