The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
And then my night got REAL pukey
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
