do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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