Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Randomize
